I’m going to be honest: I have no idea what I’m doing. Like, NO IDEA. And I’m so supremely sick of it. I’m sick of being sick of it. I want to wake up and be a successful and savvy business woman with a closet full of beautiful shoes and one of those white marble counter kitchens that never gets dirty.
But I keep doubting myself. And I’m SCARED. My fear is loud and unruly and constantly interrupting. If it were a person, it’d be that chronically nervous girl in middle school who never wanted to do anything fun. The one who held all the jackets while everyone else went on the rides. Raise your hand if you, too, are sick of these quarter-life crises.
All I know is that everyone else’s careers and relationships and even their struggles look glamorous on the outside. Jesus — what people order at a freakin’ restaurant makes me envious; their plate goes by and I think, damn…I should have ordered that.
My mom refers to it as “growing pains.” I’m sorry but AREN’T I DONE GROWING? And here’s the scariest part of all: that successful business woman with the shoes? Is she happy? Who say’s she isn’t asking herself the same questions that I’m asking myself right now? And isn’t that most TERRIFYING PART?!
Gah. If you just feel like venting, here is the place. It’s safe. I’m here. We’re here. Let’s continue to do our best and unfollow people on Instagram. Hang in there.