On Compassion (and a Giveaway!)

I’ve been thinking a lot about compassion recently. In the words of Anneli Rufus, “If we can have compassion for ourselves, then we are inviting ourselves to have compassion for others.”

With Valentine’s Day quickly approaching, the holiday splits us in two; for the heartbroken, the day is sour and depressing, for the committed…well, now’s your chance to prove your unfaltering love to the world (and you better look happy!). This year — especially this year — I want to switch it up a little bit. I’ll be practicing the holiday in the context of compassion, rather than romantic love. Towards myself first (that’s where it starts, after all), then to friends and family and loved ones around me.

While I understand compassion goes beyond material goods, I think it’s fair game to consider *treating yourself* as an act of compassion. Am I right? So, Favor Jewelry has partnered with me to offer one lucky reader the Comet Earrings, which catch the light in the prettiest way.


I have a pair myself, and I love how they shimmer in candle light and dance when you move. They’re lightweight but still make a statement.

Enter to win by commenting below, and if you’d like, share your thoughts on Valentine’s Day. You can be honest! The winner will be randomly chosen on Wednesday, by 5pm EST. Favor Jewelry is also offering 10% off for all 3 Chairs readers for the month of February with code Compassion. How gorgeous is that necklace, below? I’ve been a fan of Monika’s work for a few years now. Thank you, Favor Jewelry!


P.S. A compassion exercise for beginners: stand in front of a mirror and observe your face. Take a deep breath, then bring the attention that a grandmother would bring to the face of a beloved grandchild.

Take care of yourselves. XOXO.

Top image via a Joyful Journey. Compassion exercise via Mindful

UPDATE: A winner has been chosen. Thank you for your entries! 

26 thoughts on “On Compassion (and a Giveaway!)

  1. Those earrings are absolutely gorgeous. To be honest, I’m not a huge Valentine’s Day fan… I like to celebrate love each day. We will probably end up doing something low key: making dinner at home and just enjoying each others’ company.

  2. Love how delicacy of those earrings! I’m deciding how to handle Valentine’s day this year with my on-again-off-again man friend 🙂

  3. I feel like the day itself doesn’t feel too much different whether you are single or not but I think it’s when you open social media that it might be a different story. Also, I don’t know which is worse, being single and knowing you aren’t spending Valentine’s with anyone or being in a LDR and knowing you can’t spend time with them in person.

    p/s: those earrings look lovelyyy 🙂

  4. Love these simple, yet gorgeous pair! I think approaching Valentine’s Day with the approach of compassion is a wonderful idea; self care is also always something to focus on. I’m preparing a Galentine’s waffle brunch to celebrate amazing female friendships. <3

  5. Those earrings are so beautiful! I’m currently single, but I enjoy Valentine’s Day because it’s a day to show my family and best friends how much I love them. And now that I think about it, myself! <3

  6. Love the simplicity of these earrings (and I’m looking to add more gold to my jewelry selection lately!). I also love the focus on compassion. Just yesterday I heard a great interview about the difference between empathy (can drain you, doesn’t always translate into action) and compassion (which requires assessing your own gifts and privileges, motivating action to give to others). It was in the first or second episode here: http://www.wnyc.org/series/busted-americas-poverty-myths

  7. Beautiful earrings! I like reasons to celebrate – especially during the cold, dark months… but V-day is not my favorite. It feels very contrived. But I try to focus on the positive and just see it as a chance to celebrate love in its many forms.

  8. Love those earrings! With two little kids in school, Valentine’s Day has become about class parties, helping my kids make Valentine’s cards for all the kids in class, and kid-friendly treats 🙂

  9. I have always loved Valentine’s Day; ever since I was young, my father wrote me a card and gave me a box of chocolates every year. Now I work at a preschool, and I love the excitement of four year olds and there heart-bedazzled “mailboxes.” Single or taken, I love overloading on pink, chocolate, and love notes.

  10. Love the earings. They look so light, flowy & very comfortable. On Valentine’s day, my husband usually leaves me a note on the counter in the morning saying how thankful he is for us. Otherwise, we don’t do anything special. I do enjoy helping our girls pick out school valentine’s and letting them decorate the envelopes for each classmate.

  11. I like the reminder to do a bunch of crafting and send letters to people I love and miss! Also my boyfriend and I make pizza and lounge in bed, so enjoyable.

  12. Those earrings are gorgeous! I’ll admit that in recent years, my husband and I have dialed down the Valentine’s day celebrations once we had our kids. 🙂 We don’t mind – we find other times throughout the year to celebrate in general.

  13. Gorgeous earrings! I’ve always been meh on Valentine’s Day–and actually, some of the most disappointing ones were actually when I was in a relationship. I’m not a big fan of forced fun, and to me, Valentine’s Day is the epitome of forced, manufactured fun (though it’s a close competition with NYE!). But for the last couple of years, I’ve tried to approach Valentine’s Day differently–to think of it as a day to tell people in my life I love them, to reflect on all I have in my life to love. I think love so often gets narrowly defined to “romance,” and it can wrongly make people believe that they don’t have much love in their life if they currently don’t have a romantic partner. I know I’ve been guilty of that way of thinking too, and so have been trying to use Valentine’s Day as a reminder to be grateful for all the people I have to love–not to be sad about what I think I lack.

  14. Love your thoughts on compassion (and those earrings, too). I was excited to see they’re made in Portland! Wish we were close enough together to grab coffee on Valentine’s Day.

  15. What a lovely giveaway – the earrings are beautiful. I would love a pair. I’m not in a relationship this year, but I still kind of like Valentine’s in a fun, light-hearted way to celebrate all kinds of love (especially for children).

  16. Hi LOVE the earrings. LOVE the blog. LOVE LOVE. LOVE Valentines Day. Luke and I have a Vday tradition that you and all your readers should steal. We drink wine, eat fancy chocolate, and paint each other. Not Titanic style, just portraits. We set up a barrier (maybe out of a giant book or a pizza box) and then paint away while we sip our wine. Some years I’m drunk and go wild and abstract, other years I try really hard and it comes out hilariously bad. One year Luke painted my skin blue which still puzzles me.

  17. I’ve always enjoyed Valentine’s Day, single or not! I love giving out little notes to my friends and I think you can make the day fun no matter what your relationship status is 🙂

  18. Love this post! In previous, younger years, Valentine’s was one of those awkward holidays for me. I didn’t mind not being with someone, I just didn’t want to be seen not being with someone on that day. But in the past few years, I’ve embraced it. I get small tokens of appreciation for family members to remind them they’re loved in other ways than a romantic sense and I host a mini Galentine’s dinner with some close friends because those are also important relationships to nurture.

  19. I would love the earrings
    Making sugar cookies – heart shaped of course – with my kids is all I want to do for Valentine’s Day! A great tradition…

  20. Very sweet earrings!! We don’t super celebrate Valentine’s Day, we do exchange gifts and make time to watch a little horror film together. 😀

  21. Loving those earrings!

    I like Valentines Day solely for the fact that in February 15, all of the chocolate is 50% off. However, this year I will be smack in the middle of the Whole30, so I won’t be able to partake 😭

  22. I have a new appreciation for Valentines Day this year. My Mother lives in a neighborhood of older people, and my Five Year (who spends every Tuesday at my mothers house) came up with the idea, all on her own, of baking heart shaped cookies and decorating them to deliver to all of the neighbors in my moms neighborhood on Valentines day. How sweet is that!?

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