How Do You Define Confidence?

Confidence is interesting — for such a sure thing, it can feel so fleeting and fickle at times. Sometimes I feel completely confident in who I am and what I’ve accomplished, and other times I look in the mirror and think, “what a fool for thinking you have anything figured out.” As is life, right? It’s especially been on my mind after reading this article by Mindy Kaling on Friday, so I’d love to hear your thoughts…

Mindy defines confidence as entitlement, as something you earn. “Entitlement has gotten a bad rap because it’s used almost exclusively for the useless children of the rich, reality TV stars, and Conrad Hilton Jr., who gets kicked off an airplane for smoking pot in the lavatory and calling people peasants or whatever. But entitlement in and of itself isn’t so bad. Entitlement is simply the belief that you deserve something.” Do you agree? More from the article:

People get scared when you try to do something, especially when it looks like you’re succeeding. People do not get scared when you’re failing. It calms them. That’s why the show Intervention is a hit and everyone loves “worrying about” Amanda Bynes. But when you’re winning, it makes them feel like they’re losing or, worse yet, that maybe they should’ve tried to do something too, but now it’s too late. And since they didn’t, they want to stop you. You can’t let them.

Work hard, know your shit, show your shit, and then feel entitled. Listen to no one except the two smartest and kindest adults you know, and that doesn’t always mean your parents. If you do that, you will be fine. 

Yes ma’am! I never read the first Mindy Kaling book, but now I’m excited to pick up her new one, coming out September.

Image via Variety.

3 thoughts on “How Do You Define Confidence?

    When I started at The Office, I had zero confidence. Whenever Greg Daniels came into the room to talk to our small group of writers, I was so nervous that I would raise and lower my chair involuntarily, like a tic. Finally, weeks in, writer Mike Schur put his hand on my arm and said, gently, “You have to stop.” Years later I realized that the way I had felt during those first few months was correct. I didn’t deserve to be confident yet. I happen to believe that no one inherently deserves anything, except basic human rights, and not to have to watch an ad before you watch a trailer on YouTube.

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